There is a quiet deep down things
I cannot rumble
Will not shake.
There is a beauty among the bricks
That, contemplating,
I might break.
There is a tension, and the trigger
Is sometimes bold,
At times hair-thin.
Do I feel part of something bigger?
I cannot fathom.
May never win.
findingtimetowrite 
Wow, that knocked me back a bit (which is good, mind you). I really like what you’ve done with this poem, especially in its rhyme scheme. It’s short but complex, so I had to read it a few times again, and the poem lodged itself deeper in my mind (which is also good).
The opening line is brilliant and reminds me of e.e. cummings. Excellent work; write more.
Thank you. I don’t often do rhyming poetry, so it’s great to have some feedback on that. Interesting – e.e. cummings was a huge favourite of mine as teenager! Sometimes I wonder if our old favourites just lodge themselves in our subconscious, ready to slip out at unexpected points in our lives!
Totally stunning x