Girl, Interrupted (by Words and More Words)

This month, and, above all, this past week, I have had to shed my creative self like a snake-skin and slither back into my smooth professional self.  There are many things I enjoy about my work (performing in front of a mostly attentive audience, having my opinions mostly respected, getting paid most of the time).  Yet I can see that it is not conducive to writing.

So diametrically opposed to writing is this kind of itinerant consulting life (there, I’ve said it, that’s what I am!), that I found myself struggling to write even those book reviews I have been planning to write for the past 2-3 weeks.  Not just because of travelling, being tired, faulty or overpriced wireless networks at hotels… but because my words have all been used up.

When you use persuasive language, corporate jargon and the left side of the brain exhaustively, it becomes nearly impossible to fall in love with words again. I no longer want to play with them, soothe them with a lullaby, tease them with a come-hither look, bend them to my will or surprise them and myself.  All I want is blessed silence.

And escapist books to read.

11 thoughts on “Girl, Interrupted (by Words and More Words)”

  1. Marina Sofia – You’ve put that so very, very well! There is only so much ‘you’ available each day when it comes to words. When that resource is drained one needs to rejuvenate somehow. Each of us does that differently but it’s got to be done before the real joy of writing comes back. That’s one reason for which I’m very jealous of my writing time and can get quite cranky without it.

    1. You understand me so well! Although I think sometimes that reading poetry or Shakespeare or something like that would be more of an inspiration for my own writing. Rather than reading for sheer escapism (although even so, I cannot finish a truly awful book).

  2. I have often been troubled in the opposite direction in the work environment… how about some reports and memos composed in iambic pentameter? Nope. It wasn’t deemed acceptable…. 😉 Reading is great therapy though…

  3. My dear how well I can relate to those words, and those feelings … I work full-time for a living too and in an area where I am required to write in legal jargon (yes I am legally trained). And yes I used to believe that my work is what prevents me from writing, what is ‘on the way’ like a wall between me and my manuscript … until I realize that it is not. Because it could only be a ‘wall’ if I let it be … do not let it! Writers write; in hotel rooms, in offices during the lunch break, in prisons, in hospitals … in your own head! Nothing can take it away!
    All the best!

    1. I’d never have guessed it (that you are legally trained…). You are right, of course: it is all too easy to make excuses. I need to stop being complacent in my weariness and stop drowning my sorrows in other people’s words…

  4. I can empathise with this too. But escaping into novels can be a great transition back into writing. I’ve been really burned out lately and just read lots and lots and feel reinvigorated enough to approach my own writing. I do think you only have so many words to give though!

    1. Thank you for your understanding. I think it’s the ‘being switched on and on stage’ which can be so exhausting. I just feel I have nothing left to give, not even to my family at times, when I come back from a really demanding all-day training session.

  5. Marina,

    This resonates with my life. Just back from a trip to give a speech. All the time I wanted only to get back home and do what I’m doing this gray, gorgeous fall day- read other writers and write from my heart.

    And the silence. My most perfect companion.


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