My nightmare begins in the sweetest of ways
exploratory conversation, a joke, a slant glance then I wake up
warmed instead of chilled
at the thought of carefree happiness I believed lost.
So I learn to crave that wholesome feeling.
What if it never appears again on my horizon?
Imagine the gape, the void the want
all the missing in one laugh, a gentle touch to mark a word.
In the dark I hear a breath
do you see a way out?
Who can quite explain why
the landscape before and after seems endless and bleak?
Will I ever experience emotion again
outside of my dreams?
I think not. So night fears
hurt me less than these joyous snatches of dreamscape.
It’s almost bearable – please believe me –
it’s just the waking
from delicious dreams on a foggy winter morning
or seeing plans go to waste in the dark.
Another wintery and not very cheerful poem to link up to dVerse Poets Open Link Night. For more cheerful and interesting responses, please check out the other poets posting there tonight. The theme is ‘gifts’ and the most precious gift for me has been people’s responses to my writing over the past two years.