Mixed Metaphors, Clichés and Proverbs

Warning

 

A leopard cannot change while the sun shines

/it is clear/

all that glitters in its spots will cross the bridge

before the swine//

so desist from putting your cart ahead to skin a cat!

 

There’s more than one way to lose one’s best friend,

/believe me/

don’t cast your pearls far from the tree.

Heed my advice//               good things come to those

who hang him.

Make your hay and spare my rod.

One man’s meat is not gold and an apple

never falls

to catch the worm.

If one man’s dog is another man’s poison, why does the early bird not bite

the hand

that waits?

/and is not heard/

 

This is in partial (and inadequate) response to a prompt by Bjorn over at dVerse Poets. He invites us to mix our metaphors, but I’ve chosen some proverbs and sayings, which produced some unusual insights when jiggled and matched anew. The formatting isn’t quite right – it just doesn’t work on the screen/online as it does on my notebook. Here’s to the superior power of the printed page!

 

Absurdist Poetry for a Summer Day

How to cheer yourself up on a day when you are listless, fluey and bed-ridden? Especially when it is lovely and sunny outside and you can’t take advantage of it? Why, with a cat picture and some absurdist poetry, of course…

What My Cat Thinks

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Birds of a feather flock on the lawn for my benefit.

The early bird catches my eye but it takes two to tango.

I personally always look before I leap,

But I don’t look them in the mouth.

Given the choice, I prefer chicken before the eggs, even if they’re all in one basket.

Count the chicks? Not likely – any number will do.